Why We Don’t Dine Out Anymore and 3 Things We Do Instead
We used to love trying new restaurants and revisiting our favorites. But over the past couple of years, a few things changed that, and it just doesn’t make sense for us anymore.
We know we’re not alone. Dining out has become frustrating for a lot of people. So we wanted to share what led us to cut back and the exciting things we’re doing instead. These cost-saving alternatives are available in many locations, not just DC where we live. Let’s dive in!
Price Hikes Are Staggering
We know running a restaurant is hard. We’ve both worked in food service and have family members who owned restaurants. Margins are thin, costs are up, and the pressure is real. But as paying customers, at some point you have to ask what you’re getting for your money.
Here’s an example: For Theo’s birthday, we tried a new neighborhood spot we were excited about. Immediately, the server warned us the dishes were small, even the ones labeled as “large plates.” We ordered five small plates, dessert, and the cheapest bottle of prosecco. One plate was just bread. Another was roasted carrots in sauce. One had just two scallops. The total came to $240 with tax and tip.
We live in a major city, so we’re not surprised by higher prices. But this felt extremely unreasonable, especially for a casual dinner in our own neighborhood.
Not long after, we stopped into another local place for drinks and appetizers. The cheapest bottle of wine on the menu was $65. We had an average meal with only a few plates and ended up with a $300 bill. It didn’t feel worth it.
We thought takeout might be a better alternative. We went to DoorDash to order from our favorite Japanese restaurant. Two bowls of ramen and an order of shrimp tempura came to $85 after tip and delivery fees. We canceled the order.
We’re not trying to be cheap. We just want value for the money we spend. Unless it’s a truly special occasion, restaurant prices have passed that threshold for us.
Tipping Culture Is Out of Control
We know what it’s like to depend on tips, and we’ve always tipped 20% or more. But tipping culture has gotten messy and frustrating in recent years.
One night, I asked for the check and was handed a payment tablet. After tapping my card, the tablet asked for a tip of 20, 22, or 25%. I added a 20% tip without realizing the same amount had already been included in the bill. No one had told me. So I tipped 44% by accident (by tipping on the tip).
This has happened more than once. You can catch it if you study the bill closely, but that’s not always easy when the lights are low, you’re enjoying conversation, and you’re handed a tablet to tap with a tip suggestion already plugged in. By contrast, on a recent trip to the UK, every server circled or highlighted the 10% included gratuity on the bill.
Even when you do confirm the included tip, it’s still confusing or awkward. When you ask about an automatic gratuity, the server says they don’t actually get that tip, and the screen still prompts for an “additional tip”. Some restaurants suggest 25–30% as a starting point. Some places add a kitchen fee or a staff support fee, which is fine, but is also another add-on to the menu price you didn’t expect.
It’s hard to know what you’re actually supposed to do and what’s reasonable to budget for a night out. The bottom line is that it gets too frustrating and too expensive to be enjoyable. All of a sudden your bill is 50% more.
We’re happy to tip fairly. We love exploring food culture and dining experiences. But this aspect has taken a lot of the joy out of going out.
What We Do Instead
1. AMC A-List Membership
We signed up for the AMC A-List program and it’s been one of our best decisions. We can walk to an AMC theater from our condo, so it’s convenient, and it gives us something to look forward to each week.
The A-List membership costs $26 per person per month. It lets you see up to four movies a week. There are no blackout dates, and you can reserve your seats in advance without any additional fees.
Even if we only see a movie a week, it breaks down to $6 per person per movie. No matter how many movies, it’s a steady $52 total per month for the two of us. That’s way cheaper than a single dinner out.
We never buy concessions because the prices are outrageous. Two sodas and a popcorn cost $30. Instead, we make a Trader Joe’s dinner and espresso martinis at home, then walk to the theater. We get some exercise, enjoy the show, and talk about the movie the whole walk home. It’s become one of our favorite routines.
If you’re not near an AMC, other chains like Regal and Cinemark have similar subscription programs.
2. Don’t Tell Comedy
This has become one of our go-to alternatives to a night out at a bar or restaurant. Don’t Tell Comedy hosts pop-up stand-up shows in secret venues across dozens of US cities. You don’t know the exact location until the day of the show, and you don’t know the lineup until the comedians walk on stage. But that’s part of the fun.
Tickets are usually $25–$30 per person, so $50–$60 for a couple. The shows are BYOB, which keeps costs way down. We’ll bring a couple of cans of wine or an insulated bag with beers and enjoy a great night for less than the price of a main dish at most restaurants.
Every show we’ve attended has felt fresh and intimate. Venues range from rooftops and backyards to warehouses and local art studios. The comics are amazing and no two shows are the same.
If you’re in a city where they operate (and chances are, you are), it’s an easy, fun way to spend a night without blowing your budget. We’ve also started looking for Don’t Tell shows when we travel. It’s a cool way to get a feel for the local vibe.
3. Signature Theatre Cabaret Series
This one’s specific to our location, but it’s a good example of how to support local arts while getting great value.
Signature Theatre puts on a series of live cabaret shows throughout the season. They’re small, intimate performances featuring talented vocalists and musicians. The quality is consistently excellent.
We bought a four-show package for $168 per person or $84 per show per couple, for live entertainment just a few blocks from home. The venue is cozy, the seats are good, and the performances are outstanding. We don’t need expensive Ubers or parking and we can dine at home before the show.
Look for something similar in your area: local theater, jazz nights, community concerts, or even university performances. These events often fly under the radar but can be some of the most enjoyable nights out.
Other Fun Things We Plan
- Cooking a special meal together at home (we’ve done sushi nights, pizza-making, and Thai curry from scratch)
- Seeing live music at a small local venue
- Booking a one-night stay at a bougie hotel with points, just for a change of scenery
- Visiting a free museum and ending the day with happy hour instead of dinner
These options still cost money, but we feel like we’re getting more out of the experience.
And if we’re going to splurge, we plan something more intentional. For example, Signature Theatre also does full-scale musicals. Tickets aren’t cheap (about $220 for a couple with good seats) but it feels like a real night out. We dress up and enjoy the energy of live theater. It’s an exciting experience that supports local arts.
Our Take
We haven’t sworn off restaurants completely. We still go out when we’re traveling, of course, or for a tasting menu we’ve been excited to try.
We love food. We’re obsessed with Top Chef and can’t wait to share our experience at Chef Eric Adjepong’s Elmina right here in Washington DC. More on that soon!
But as a habit, it doesn’t work for us anymore to dine out regularly.
Do you feel the same way? Let us know what you’ve swapped dining out for. We’re always looking for new ideas.
